About Me

My photo
e. l . wood is a native of birmingham, alabama. he grew up on the urban streets of dallas, texas before attending college at houston baptist university where he earned a b. a. in english and psychology. after a year of teaching high school english in the public schools of houston, e. l. wood attended sam houston state university where he earned a master’s degree in english. after bouncing around the deep south for several years, he finished his ph. d. in american literature before 1900 at the university of southern mississippi. e. l. wood has been teaching in some capacity since 1992 and has taught for a local community college since 1995. in his spare time, e.l. wood enjoys reading, movies, and the outdoors. he is personally acquainted with several search and rescue teams around the southeast. he is married to the lovely and gracious a. c. they have a daughter (special k), and one dog. They reside in h'burg, deep south. in addition to being the sole proprietor of the gandy dancer billiard parlor, e. l. wood dabbles in folk art and the occasional cultivation of a handlebar mustache.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

halloween costume trivia

the beaglepuss, or funny glasses, are novelty disguises usually utilizing fake glasses (often horn-rimmed); fake moustache and bushy eyebrows; and a large, protruding plastic nose. originally designed as a caricature of groucho marx and marketed in the 1940’s, the groucho glasses have evolved over time into various forms of silly disguises.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

happy halloween week!!!



around halloween time when i was a kid, my grandmother, snookie, would recite this poem by james whitcomb riley to the kids. it would scare the bejeebers out of me. hope you and yours have a frightfully fun halloween!

Little Orphant Annie
Little Orphant Annie's come to our house to stay,
An' wash the cups an' saucers up, an' brush the crumbs away,
An' shoo the chickens off the porch, an' dust the hearth, an' sweep,
An' make the fire, an' bake the bread, an' earn her board-an'-keep;
An' all us other children, when the supper-things is done,
We set around the kitchen fire an' has the mostest fun
A-list'nin' to the witch-tales 'at Annie tells about,
An' the Gobble-uns 'at gits you
Ef you Don't Watch Out!

Wunst they wuz a little boy wouldn't say his prayers,--
An' when he went to bed at night, away up-stairs,
His Mammy heerd him holler, an' his Daddy heerd him bawl,
An' when they turn't the kivvers down, he wuzn't there at all!
An' they seeked him in the rafter-room, an' cubby-hole, an' press,
An' seeked him up the chimbly-flue, an' ever'-wheres, I guess;
But all they ever found wuz thist his pants an' roundabout:--
An' the Gobble-uns 'll git you Ef you Don't Watch Out!

An' one time a little girl 'ud allus laugh an' grin,
An' make fun of ever' one, an' all her blood-an'-kin;
An' wunst, when they was "company," an' ole folks wuz there,
She mocked 'em an' shocked 'em, an' said she didn't care!
An' thist as she kicked her heels, an' turn't to run an' hide,
They wuz two great big Black Things a-standin' by her side,
An' they snatched her through the ceilin' 'fore she knowed what she's about!
An' the Gobble-uns 'll git you Ef you Don't Watch Out!

An' little Orphant Annie says, when the blaze is blue,
An' the lamp-wick sputters, an' the wind goes woo-oo!
An' you hear the crickets quit, an' the moon is gray,
An' the lightnin'-bugs in dew is all squenched away,--
You better mind yer parunts, an' yer teachurs fond an' dear,
An' churish them 'at loves you, an' dry the orphant's tear,
An' he'p the pore an' needy ones 'at clusters all about,
Er the Gobble-uns 'll git you Ef you Don't Watch Out!


Monday, October 25, 2010

you know, winning, it's like better than losing. - nuke laloosh




congratulations to the texas rangers on their historic victory over the new york yankees to win the american league pennant. we're proud of you all and look forward to the upcoming world series!

go rangers!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

free stats for the dallas cowboys


add up the following and what do you get?

1 rookie of the year award
2 time player of the year
4 time rushing leader
5 pro bowls
15,269 rushing yards
109 touchdowns
0 spikes of the football in an nfl career
______________________________________________
0 yards in celebration penalties

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Thursday, October 07, 2010

viva texas rangers

i’m a forty year old baseball fan who grew up in dallas pulling for the rangers in the old minor league stadium. growing up, some highlights for me as a fan include getting to see guys like the following play and manage at the ball park (these appear in no particular order as they pop into my mind): billy martin, toby harrah, gaylord perry, bobby valentine, charlie hough, pete incaviglia, jose canseco, will clark, rusty greer, mitch williams, julio franko, jim sundberg, rubin sierra, juan gonzalez, harold baines, kenny rogers, buck showalter, kevin brown, and, of course, o captain, my captain, the nolan ryan.



and a big thank you to ryan, not only for the memories as a hall of fame pitcher, but also for creating new memories from the front office. thank you for putting together a fun product on the field. ron and the boys are so much fun to watch. it’s a treat to see a texas rangers team playing ball the right way and winning. the last couple of seasons have been a blast!

and yesterday was yet another great day in what has been a joyous season (other fans can complain about losing all they want; but when you’re only a 50-year-old club and have never won a playoff series, that trumps curses and droughts in my book). wow. game one down (thanks, cliff lee . . . you ‘da man!)



keep the claws and antlers flying high!!!!!